Have To and Want To

There are so many have-to’s at Christmas time.
Decorating the house.
Buying presents.
Wrapping presents.
Sending cards.

Often, people get so burdened by the have-to’s they forget the want-to’s.
There is a difference.

Have-to’s can make you irritable.
Have-to’s can make you resentful.
Have-to’s can often feel like an albatross is hanging around your neck.

Want-to’s bring out the joy that has been tucked away far too long!
Want-to’s make you pleasant to be around.
Want-to’s bring out the best in you.

There were two sisters that exemplify the Have-to’s and Want-to’s.

As Jesus and His disciples were on their way, He came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to Him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what He said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to Him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:38-42)

Isn’t if nice to know that we have the examples of Martha and Mary?
Especially at this time of year, the line between the have-to and the want-to gets blurry.

We tend to put ourselves into one of two categories.
We are like Martha when we are busy and frustrated about our to-do list.
We are like Mary when we are calm and enjoying this special time of year.

In reality, we are not either/or.
In reality, we are both!

The world needs a Martha!
Martha gets things done.
Martha makes sure everything on the list is completed.
Martha wraps the gifts and sends the cards.
She just might not be too pleasant as she does those tasks.

The world needs a Mary!
Mary takes the time to sit, to listen to a heart, to have that extra cup of tea.
Mary knows her list will wait until tomorrow.
Mary will get around to buying the gifts and sending the cards, if there is time.
Mary is not stressed; she brings a sense of calm to everyone around her.

The Marthas of the world wish they had more Mary-like qualities.
The Marys of the world know that Martha-like behavior accomplishes much.

Jesus said that Mary had chosen what is better!
What is better is spending time with Him!

Jesus knew that what Martha did was important.
There were guests to take care of, hospitality to offer.
Martha made things run smoothly so that Mary could listen to Jesus.
However, in the distraction, Martha forgot to listen to Jesus herself.

Martha did not choose what was better.
Martha chose other things before Jesus.
Had she put time with Jesus first, her Martha-like qualities would have softened a bit.

Jesus knew that even though Mary chose what was better, she had work to do as well.
Spending time with Jesus first put her priorities in order.
Mary will never be a Martha, but she will get things done in her own way and time.

Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33)

ALL these things.
All the Martha things.

The Mary perspective so that the Martha things are done with the right heart.
The have-to accomplished after the want-to has been enjoyed.
The want-to of spending time with Jesus first.

Are you a Martha?
Good, things are getting done.

Are you a Mary?
Good, you have listened first before doing.

Are you, both?
Probably.
Jesus knows that and has no condemnation.

Each is vital to the Kingdom.
Each plays an important part.

Have-to and want-to.
Mary and Martha.
Precious to Jesus.

Especially at this time of year.
Choose the better thing.

Spend time with Jesus first!

2 responses to “Have To and Want To”

1. well said. it is both and you put it so well. thanks

   Reply

   • Debbie,
     It is freeing to know that we are both and that Jesus understands.
     The “want-to” of putting Jesus first.
     Gina

     Reply