Because I Said So

I saw the exasperation in her face.
I felt it as I overheard their conversation.
A mother talking to a toddler as they went about their errands.
The toddler sprinkling the conversation with staccato break-ins of, Why?

We need the umbrella when we leave.
But why?
Because it’s raining?
But why?

I smiled, remembering.

Because that is just the way the weather is today.
But why?
Because the ground needs rain.
But why?

Because the flowers have to grow in the spring.
But why?
Because that is just what happens in the spring; the mother was losing steam.
But why?

Because that is just the way it is.
But why?
She tousled her little child’s hair and laughed.
But why, why, why, she said, their noses pressed together as they both giggled.

Why indeed?

Often parents experience the same exasperation over the, Why? question.
Parents may engage for a while.
Soon, the questions get the better of them.
They have to end the seemingly endless conversation.

Especially when it is a matter of discipline, the trump card is pulled.
The gauntlet is laid down.
The gavel pounds.
Because I said so.

If truth were told, that statement is ineffective.
It answers nothing.
It solves nothing.
It slams the door shut on further discussion.

Yet, if we were honest, we have all said it at one time or another.
We said it in a moment of frustration.
We said it when we were tired.
We said it when we just don’t want to talk about it any more.

Can you imagine if that statement was used in a political debate?
Can you imagine if that statement was used on the witness stand?
Think of when that statement is used.
Think of when, or if, it is ever effective.

We all can remember conversations that ended abruptly.
We can all remember times when a conversation was shut down by that statement.
We can all remember how we felt on the other side of the conversational window.
On the other side of the window looking in at a discussion that is no more.

Because I said so pulls rank.
Because I said so ends the discussion.
Because I said so, gives the person who said it the upper hand, for a time.
Because I said so, leaves the other person feeling misunderstood.

Is it worth it?
Is it fruitful?
Is it kind?
Is it God-honoring?

God allows us to ask Him, Why?
God welcomes the Why? question.
Often, it is in the answer to our Why? question that God’s glory is most clearly seen.
Why? is found all throughout God’s Word.

Why, O Lord, do you stand far off? Why do You hide Yourself in times of trouble? (Psalm 10:1)
Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? (Psalm 42:5)
Why does the Almighty not set times for judgment? Why must those who know Him look in vain for such days? (Job 24:1)
Why do You always forget us? Why do You forsake us for so long? (Lamentations 5:20)

Why? is the question of lament.
Why? is the question that begs another question.
Why? is the question of confusion and sometimes despair.
Why? is unanswerable apart from God.

Tired parents answer, Because I said so.
That answer is incomplete.
Why? will always be asked in this fallen world.
There is only one Answer that satisfies the Why? question.

Even Jesus asked Why?

From the sixth hour until the ninth hour darkness came over all the land. About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice,” Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani,” which means, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me? “ (Matthew 27:45,46)

At the height of His pain, at the moment of His intense suffering, Jesus asked, Why?
God did not dismiss Jesus’ question.
God did not get angry when Jesus asked, Why?
God did not change the circumstances that brought about the question in the first place.

What if God had changed the conditions so that Jesus never had to ask, Why?
We would still be in our sins.
In essence, God said, Because I said so.
However, God did not say it in frustration; God said it in a tone of complete and utter love.

Because I said so, was spoken when God determined that Jesus would be born to die.
Because I said so, was explained when Jesus was named.
Why?
Because He will save the people from their sins. (Matthew 1:21)

The ultimate Why? question was answered on the cross.
Because God said so.
Jesus answered in obedience…yet not My will but Yours be done. (Luke 22:42)
When God says, Because I said so, our salvation is wrapped up in its meaning.

Anytime we say those words, we fall short.
There is something much better to say to a child or to ourselves.
To a child: Because God put me in authority over you to love you and teach you.
To ourselves: I don’t understand, God, but I trust You; You answered me on the cross.

Why? has its ultimate Answer in Christ.
That question, asked through the ages, has already been answered.
Perfectly.
Because God said so, and Jesus obeyed.