Jan
18
2016
The Scorecard
Posted in Marriage Leave a comment
They sat in the back while we sat in the front.
My husband was driving while I was in the passenger seat.
The future groom and his future bride were in the car with us.
My son, the soon-to-be husband, was sitting next to the young woman who will be his wife.
We were searching for places to have their rehearsal dinner.
We had reservations for lunch, followed by appointments at a few locations.
It was so nice to talk with them one-on-one.
It is so wonderful to hear their dreams.
My husband was the one who found the places we were visiting.
I was so sure that one of the two restaurants would be the place we would choose.
My husband kept telling me, you have to actually see it.
You cannot go by the picture on their website.
The place that looked so warm and inviting in the pictures was actually dark and dreary.
The man who was to meet us, never showed up.
The cook in his white coat, wearing Crocs, gave us the tour.
I knew instantaneously, this was not the place.
The other place that my husband was so sure of, looked too modern to me.
Me, the lover of quilts and wood, did not like the block furniture and square illuminated tables.
There were mirrors and waterfalls.
It was not my style; it was not the bride and groom’s style either.
Their wedding will be very rustic.
Their venue is set at a beautiful farm.
Somehow, block furniture in bold colors and square tables lit from the bottom does not fit.
We visited some more places.
My husband got that look on his face; the little smirk that begins in the corner of his mouth.
And WHO said that restaurant would not be the right one?
WHO said…he continued with all the suggestions HE made that actually worked out that day.
He wasn’t being mean; but he was keeping score on some sort of imaginary scorecard.
It was all said tongue in cheek.
He was right on many of the things he suggested that day.
I was playing the game, too, and would not let him think he was right.
I would only give him credit where credit was due.
The imaginary scorecard seemed to be tipping in his favor.
My son and his fiance watched us.
They saw all the little looks and all the teasing.
They know us by now; they know that it is all in good fun.
As we drove in the car, I began telling stories.
The day we went looking for our first apartment was very interesting.
I could see them look back and forth at each other out of the corner of my eye.
The first apartment we visited was the one I wanted, but dad said we had to visit other places.
I could see my son’s fiance pointing at him and mouthing, That’s just like you!
We drove around all day visiting apartment after apartment; none compared to the first one.
We went back to the first apartment’s rental office and signed the lease.
I just knew, I said, putting an imaginary stroke on the scorecard.
We stopped at a little coffee shop to sit for a while and talk about our options.
My son voiced his opinions about the places we saw that afternoon.
He had valid concerns.
Do you have any suggestions? I asked him, knowing he probably did.
He named a restaurant on the other side of the city.
It is a restaurant we have been to before.
It is in a charming section of the city near a market and a wonderful book store.
My kind of place, his kind of place, her kind of place.
We drove there and went inside.
As soon as we walked in the door, my husband spoke up.
I suggested this place a while back but you didn’t seem to like the idea at the time.
The imaginary scorecard again.
My son and his fiance laughed.
This was now bordering on the absurd.
See what you have to look forward to in thirty-four years, I said.
I patted my husband on the back for assurance.
That restaurant will probably be the place.
Two months before the wedding, their rooftop will be open.
It is a farm-to-table restaurant with delicious, healthy food.
In my mind, it was our son who found this place.
The scorecard has been destroyed.
We went back to our son’s house that he shares with two friends.
It was a wonderful day all around.
It was a day when this young couple saw the real-ness of marriage.
There is a bit of score keeping that you tend to laugh about but is there nonetheless.
I wonder what their children will notice about them in thirty-four years?
Will scorecards be obsolete by then?
Or is it just human nature that we tend to put feathers in our own caps from time to time?
I don’t things will be terribly different.
As we left our son’s house and walked to our car, we were holding hands.
Just like we always do when we walk somewhere together.
A man was coming towards us on the street.
He was smiling long before he was ready to pass us.
Look at that; still holding hands after all these years!
Yes, five children later, too, I added.
Five children? What a blessing! he said enthusiastically.
He passed us still smiling.
Neither of us said anything about what the man said.
We continued to hold hands until we got to the car.
See what you have to look forward to in thirty-four years?
I looked over at my husband and smiled.
May your fountain be blessed and may you rejoice with the wife of your youth. (Proverbs 5:18)
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