The Head Tilt

I was carefully driving behind a man on a bike.
It was a gorgeous spring day.
Everyone seemed to be using a bike as their mode of transportation.
There are many country roads that do not have bike lanes, so sharing the road is in order.

I had my window down as I was driving.
The breeze was coming in and wafting across my face.
The man who was cycling was wearing a bright yellow shirt to make it easier to be seen.
I could hear the bike gears shifting as he pedaled.

I intended to drive out of my lane a bit to safely pass him.
Coming towards me, in the other direction, was another cyclist.
I waited behind the man that was on my side of the road.
There was no safe way to pass him.

I watched as the two cyclists approached each other.
It was then I saw it: the head tilt.
It is not a wave.
It is a simple, nonchalant acknowledgment of the other person.

I would go so far as to say it is mostly a guy thing.
I have two sons.
I remember the head tilt.
It began when they got too old for an official wave.

They were never too old in my eyes.
They suddenly became too old in their eyes.
The head tilt was subtle enough to be under the radar.
The head tilt was sincere enough for me to know that they saw me.

The head tilt first happened on the way to the bus stop.
As I stood at the door one day for that final wave, the wave was not returned.
In its place was the head tilt.
I can still see my sons looking over toward the house knowing I was there.

I waved from the door and up until that day, an exuberant wave was returned.
Exuberant in their younger years when their backpack was bigger than they were.
The head tilt seem to coincide with their age.
The head tilt came much too fast for me.

The head tilt happened at concerts.
The head tilt happened at school events.
The head tilt happened as I watched them play sports.
The head tilt happened if they were in a crowd.

The head tilt was still full of love.
The head tilt was ours alone.
The head tilt conveyed so much in one subtle gesture.
The head tilt was something I recognized but never discussed with my sons.

Soon, I saw the head tilt in other places.
I saw the head tilt happen all around me.
What I thought was ours alone, was not really ours alone.
The head tilt was a way to acknowledge another person without being too obvious.

I figured there was some unwritten code somewhere.
I figured that all young boys eventually reached the age of the head tilt.
All a mother could do was embrace it.
All a mother could do was accept that her boy was growing up.

Just when I got used to the head tilt, my boys surprised me.
I remember a Bible study morning in our home.
The women had all arrived but that day happened to be a scheduled two-hour delay.
My boys were in high school at the time and they had not left the house yet.

My sons had their breakfast in the dining room instead of the kitchen that morning.
When they brought their dishes into the kitchen, they said hello to the women gathered there.
They grabbed their backpacks and each came over and gave me a hug.
Love you, Mom, they said as they went out the door.

There was a collective, Awww, as the women said how sweet that was to witness.
I wanted to clarify what they witnessed, but they would not have understood.
The wave that became the head tilt, without warning became the hug.
Somehow, everything came full circle and I was glad.

I didn’t care about the collective, Awww, as much as I cared about the journey.
My sons went through the appropriate seasons.
Their love was just as strong but the demonstration of that love changed as they grew.
We hug a lot in our family; the head tilt is almost never seen anymore.

When I saw the two cyclists on the road doing the head tilt, I laughed.
The head tilt is alive and well, I said out loud in the car.
I passed the cyclist safely.
I noticed that one cyclist turned around and joined the other as they rode on together.

Then He said to them all: “Whoever wants to be My disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow Me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for Me will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self? Whoever is ashamed of Me and My words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when He comes in His glory and in the glory of the Father and of the holy angels.“ (Luke 9:23-26)

A head tilt is not good enough to acknowledge Jesus.
We must not be ashamed of Him.
We must not cower in the corner afraid to let others know that we belong to Him.
Only a loving embrace of our Lord Jesus will do.

Only complete disclosure.
Only total honesty.
Only refreshing transparency.
Only total commitment to the One who took the punishment that we deserved.

We all go through times of head tilting in our spiritual journey.
We test the waters.
We want to be accepted so we stifle our public commitment.
However, one day it comes full circle.

We grow up in our faith.
We realize that the exuberant wave we had when we were first saved has not been lost.
The head tilt happened when we thought more of the crowd than about the Lord Jesus.
One day, through the Holy Spirit, only a full embrace of our Lord Jesus will do.

If we are ashamed of Him, He will be ashamed of us in front of His Father.
If we fail to acknowledge Him, He will fail to acknowledge us one day.
Being His disciple can never be half-hearted.
We must be all in; no head tilts allowed.