Self-fulfilling Prophecy

Our Philadelphia 76ers are one loss away from matching a record.
The record is the longest losing streak in NBA history.
I am not an avid sports fan, but I do pay attention to my hometown teams.
I cannot listen to the news on the radio without the constant reminder of their losses.

I am sure there are armchair basketball fans that have figured out the reasons why.
I am sure those same armchair fans think they could do a better job of coaching.
It is easy to point a finger from the sidelines.
It is easy to assign blame.

What about that old self-fulfilling prophecy?

Twentieth century sociologist, Robert Merton coined the phrase.
A self-fulfilling prophecy is a positive or negative prophecy.
It is a strongly held belief or delusion that is declared as truth though it is actually false.
It influences people so that their reactions ultimately fulfill the once false prophecy.

In the case of the Sixers, no one can deny the truth of their losing streak.
How beneficial is it to keep focusing on it?

I heard a father talking to his son in a restaurant.
The father was a bit loud and obviously liked to be in control.
The son suggested something to remedy a situation they were discussing.
That’s the stupidest thing I ever heard you say!

I glanced over at the son, since he was facing me.
He was deflated.
All the air was sucked out of his balloon.
That one sentence will be remembered over the thousands of others his father said.

How different the father’s response could have been.
Now that’s an interesting idea. I always appreciate the way you look at things.
That would have left the door open for further discussion.
The father’s actual response slammed the door in his son’s face.

Easy for me to be an armchair observer.
If we only realized the incredible importance of our words and our tone.
If we only remembered the power we have in the words we choose.
We need help to do this right.

My daughter has a sociology class.
They just finished watching the movie, The Breakfast Club.
Written and directed by John Hughes, it is a study in stereotypes.
It is a study of the self-fulfilling prophecy.

There are language issues in the film that may warrant caution for some.
Yet, the message is an important one.
We never know who a person really is down deep by their outward appearance.
We judge based on what we see, and so often, we are dead wrong.

If a boy is told over and over that he is stupid and worthless, he will believe just that.
Why should he try when he is defeated before he even gets out of the gate?
If a girl is told she is ugly, she will have a hard time seeing her own beauty in the mirror.
Our words matter, greatly.

We parents, have incredible power in our tongues.
We can exert undue pressure on our children to succeed.
We can talk too much within earshot of our children, and vent our complaints.
We can influence the outlook our children have on life based on our own negativity.

We all have baggage.
Some of that baggage we have carried into our adult life.
Much of that baggage should have been left at baggage claim years ago.
That unresolved baggage affects our children.

We are expecting our children to grow up way too fast.
There are now try-outs for neighborhood sport teams; rec leagues that used to be for all.
We are putting our children on the fast track, but to what destination?
What trophy or success matters as much as their well-being?

The only way to demolish the stronghold of negativity is with truth.

I have summoned you by name, you are Mine. (Isaiah 43:1)
Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. (Hebrews 13:5)
I have engraved you on the palms of My hands. (Isaiah 49:16)
I loved you with an everlasting love. (Jeremiah 31:3)
Yes, I am coming soon. (Revelation 22:20)

Ephesians 1:1-14 tells us who we are in Christ.
I am chosen before the creation of the world.
I am holy and blameless.
I am adopted as His child.
I have redemption.
I am forgiven.
I have purpose.
I have hope.
I am included.
I am sealed with the promised Holy Spirit.

On and on the promises in God’s word remind us of our identity in Christ.
That identity in Christ trumps any other false assumption.
That identity demolishes any strongholds that may paralyze us, making us ineffective.
That identity in Christ is a confidence booster.

Our identity in Christ is the only identity we need.
That is who we are.
No words can destroy what Christ builds.

He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)

God is not done with us yet.
We ALL are a work in progress.
We must give to others the same grace we expect to receive.
We all need our edges polished, and our corners softened.

Only God, through His Word and His Spirit, can do that buffing properly.
Words can hurt us deeply.
In Christ, we know better than to believe anything that contradicts Him.
Jesus is The Word, after all.